we all titillated by assless chaps but ho-hum when it comes to assless shirts

Bean Dad seems familiar. But not *too* familiar. But not too not familiar.

List my cause of death as "catching up on days-old Dear Abby columns"

Only one more sleep til #WandaVision

Haunted doll watch

Eight of Swords came up in my morning tarot reading and I wondered whether maybe she's trying out new ADHD medication.

"Sorry I'm not as cool as your baby. What's up, you cool baby?"

I’m begging journalists to write pieces about the so-called “labor shortage” that actually involve asking workers who’ve left service industries about why they won’t return to low-paying jobs with no benefits and poor working conditions. Stop only interviewing business owners.

Functioning labels are so focused on productivity that they overlook the most important question: What do you need support with? Needs are individual. People with the same disability don't always benefit from the same accommodations or support measures. Thread 🧵1/

I'm sorry ghost busters, but I'd rather be haunted than make a phone call. Nothing personal.

Someone just asked me if it’s true that ADD meds are more addictive than heroin. I’ve forgotten to take my ADD meds for the last three days in a row. If you can forget you’re addicted to heroin then yeah, it’s probably the same thing.

Surely, a tweet that will never be taken out of context by anyone, ever.