Her: when you said "magical in bed" this isn't exactly what I was exp- Me: *holds up 8 of hearts* is this your card Her: *softly* holy shit

"Hi, my name is Wut? My name is Who? My name is..." Said the lady suffering from Alzheimers.

it's a tricky situation when you're in a mosque where everybody's busy praying and you really enjoy leapfrog

"Boo" actually means "return" in Australian. Because if you throw a regular meringue...

if you're having word problems I feel bad for you son I got 99 contacts And my "chat" is 1

What if Johnny Depp just wanted to give her a high five but missed?

I wish I had hair like Nathan Ro

Currently my life is just like a Rihanna song. It's just work, work, work... and the rest I can't really understand.

Won a gold medal in fighting for the 2nd consecutive year. Bronze in kata Gold in bunkai

I strongly dislike the new twitter layout on blackberry. I keep accidentally clicking the 'heart' thing when I really just want to reply

@TrendOFM BlackByrd @OFM9497 there's an imposter in that photo

Hello Twitter, my old friend I've come to tweet on you again I won 2 medals in the SA Goju Kai Championship this year. Qualified for Canada

Bruce Jenner should start a transit business. He should call it Transjenner.

Bahrain is fast asleep. If I was the president of Bahrain, I would immediately change the national anthem. Bah Bah Bah - Bah Bah Bahrain

@zbzoebrown Saw you struggle with balance in excercises. What we do in karate, when we practice kicks, is put ur foot in a nearly 45' angle

Guess who graded to his Shodan in karate; top of his class..... THIS GUY

She's so shy & scared and sang so beautifully with her ventriloquist bunny and Mel B golden buzzered her and now I'm crying on my braaivleis

Wow. With the amount Virat Kohli is crying in this test we can expect our dam levels to increase. vivid Bhavna Maharaj Virat Kohli