ME: kno why i lov the 2nd amendment WIFE: please take off the costu- ME: BC I HAV THE RIGHT TUBE AIR ARMS WIFE: … ME: pic.x.com/bsI0vfPrYD

War is a woman's playground....The Phoinix: Age of Demigods out now and on sale! #YoungAdult #WinterReads

Guilty pleasures....finding Tombstone on YouTube without having to pay for it!

#amreading #amwriting

That day when a new Harry Potter book is announced and every writer bows their head to their Queen.

Headline win of the day: "Octopus mating event cancelled due to cannibalism concerns."

Quote of the day: "a film so fucked up Satan would see it twice"

I blame hipsters for shunning away emotionally distant men. I wanna talk about our feelings about as much as you want a tampon up your ass.

Quote of the day: "listen up, you contemptuous twat." *points finger warningly then storms away* Hahaha that'll teach her!

Convo of the day: Kev: "Living with you could be dangerous" Me: "I prefer adventurous." Me: 😈

quotes of the night: "I'm not a hooker!"

Scene of the day: when a fucking wizard drops by Starbucks for a frapp, followed by a girl in a short dress wearin flood boots #NewWalmart ?

Convo of the Day: "Why is he still alive?" "Cuz he isn't dead yet!"

You know you're a writer when you scour archeology journals for a description on a piece of furniture from 500 B.C. #ThePhoinix

Quote from fav movie: what did one shepherd say to the other? Let's get the flock out of here

Writer's tip: do not watch Shakespeare while you're writing your book.

Interviewer: Why did you kill off so and so? Writer: I studied writing at the School of CW: majored in Supernatural & minored in Shakespeare

Favorite line in book 3: "Loki clapped as he jumped up and down like a delighted imp."

Word of the day: Skittletits

How a writer writes when they have cats