Wow. Just wow. #Adolescence might be one of the most incredible things I've ever watched. Every single person involved with that show deserves to win every award available. Especially the actors. And extra especially the dad. Because wow. @Netflix

There's still time to pick one of these up from the Alcatraz gift shop... ya know, just in case... #Alcatraz

Hey SpaceX Elon Musk - could you maybe let us know ahead of time when you’re going to cause some crazy shit to happen in the sky? Because huge explosions that rattle my entire neighborhood late at night, followed by a fireball streaking across the sky… that’s a little scary.

Wait a sec… when did Michael Scott become an ASL interpreter? #TheOffice

YESSSS!!! This is the best news I’ve heard in 38 years! Hollywood is saved! Now how can I audition to be in it?! I’ll do anything - play any part - no matter how small! Come on Mel Brooks - just give me a chance, please!

What is it about getting older that makes you wake up one day and want to start gardening?

Also, as a sidenote, slightly related to that last post, I’ve also got a hummingbird feeder that’s been really popping off lately.

My dream in life is to one day live somewhere where the internet works reliably.

Ralph’s in LA now has Skyline Chili cans!!! YES!!! Everything is gonna be fine, you guys. Now that we have Skyline, we will get through this. #tears

Wow. The new Dexter is sooo insanely good, it’s blowing my mind! They better not kill him again in the finale. #DexterResurrection

An exclusive club so exclusive that no one went there. Actually… I did, one time, with Olga Kay, and it was neat I guess. But only because they shot a scene in Blade Runner there. So yeah, cool building… boring social club.

100% deserved. One of the best dramatic performances I’ve seen in years. And the whole series was just incredible.

There’s not a whole lot of stuff in this world that’s funnier than a pug pooping.

I asked Sora to make a video of me telling a funny joke. In the video, the fake AI me refers to himself as a "tired, old dad." And that wasn't even the joke part! Guess it's time to get plastic surgery. Or maybe more sleep and exercise. #Sora2

You put up a good fight though, Bruce. Unfortunately, I was just faster. #BruceLee

Let’s goooo Los Angeles Dodgers!!!

People are worried AI is taking over the world. But this is proof that it probably SHOULD. Because humans are too dumb to be making major decisions for the world anymore. appleinsider.com/articles/25/11…

HELL. NO. wdwnt.com/2025/11/disney…

Saying goodbye is NOT easy. twitch.tv/videos/9864577…

Call me a lady's man, but I always tell girls, "The fastest way to my heart... is by tearing a hole straight through my rib cage."