Amazon will tell you your package is coming in 5 days, then deliver it the next day. These are the only kind of lies I need in my life.

When I break into a house but they’re watching Lamar Jackson’s 2019 unanimous MVP highlights.

Lo primero que hago al llegar a casa:

When I’m angry and I hear someone say “she’s always like that”

Me remembering how far the Lord has brought me 🩵

me running off the clock when they ask can anyone stay late

how it feels being violently high in public

I can’t believe Justin still has this affect on me at my big age

justin arriving at coachella

i grew up on Cheaters, Maury & First 48. i know when sht ain't adding up

Soon as Justin Bieber announces this tour my brothers car going on marketplace

Before ChatGPT, it was a community of students, warriors, who’d upload full tests to QUIZLET.

can't believe it's almost may. time flies when you work every day of your fucking life

Quando vc vai nas notas do seu celular procurar uma senha e acaba achando um textão falando de como se sentia

& behind what I birthed.. I'll knock all ts over.

eu no meu único dia de folga:

I’ll never forget when Biggie hid behind Tinkabella (who was pregnant at the time) while her friend was getting attacked on the Baddies Midwest Reunion! 👀😬