Playing The Witness - Witness: "Here is an alligator." Me: "Now I must wrestle the alligator until I am dead."

4-year-old Moments: "The Bookta Vacuum goes 'bookta bookta bookta. It is a vacuum but it goes fast, like a racecar."

Then someone called us on the phone to ask if we were space guys. (The answer was, "Yes.")

Why do they put Indian restaurants right on the road where I am driving past hungry?

Four hours of errands with a four-year-old should be a criminal penalty of some kind.

Like for something pretty serious too.

Ugh, and still dinner to make. Anyone know anything quick but interesting to do with cod other than garlic/lemon pan-frying?

The Witness is like a hot bath that is intermittently and unpredictably electrified. I've never been so simultaneously soothed and irritated

Well, that was a depressing day of encountering someone I'd previously been a fan of.

Anyone know a good YouTube video debunking channel that *won't* drop in digs at Anita Sarkeesian and explode when called on it?

It's okay because see he's a feminist and he knows so many women that he even knows one of their first names (Rebecca) which he namedropped.

@xeni Ellen Datlow His fans don't actually see this as a criticism, though.

Welp, time to watch Extra Credits Studios's Dan lose/win Dark Souls while I wash the dishes. With scents of thyme and slightly rancid butter!

Manbabies on YouTube continuing to call me fat and high-five each other for third straight day.

I want a new career. Can we make "board game sommelier" a thing?

73 yr old Harrison Ford is able to return to role of Indiana Jones, but 47 yr old Lucy Lawless "too old" to play Xena again. Ah, Hollywood.

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Archie is four and already making up Widowmaker/Tracer fanfic.

Admittedly, I have to play the role of Widowmaker and wear a necktie on my head to represent her hair.