RT if you’d like me to represent the UK at #Eurovision 2022.

🎶My old man's a dustman He wears a dustman's hat Because he is a dustman We've just established that🎶

Here we are… This is the list of cancellations taken in one of our restaurants in the past six days… 654 guests I understand why. Public health is THE most important thing. But what will the government do to support the industry? Many places will crumble without help…

If Wham! released 'All I Want For Christmas Is You' 🎄🎶

My mate’s cousin, Matt, is quite laterally a genius. Praise be to his lateral flow church…

STOP WHAT YOU ARE DOING AND WATCH THIS MOMENT FROM THE ONE SHOW

Angela Rayner best put down since Julia Gillard demolished Tony Abbott sexism “My advice to the Deputy PM is to cut out the snobbery and brush up on his opera. The Marriage of Figaro is the story of a working-class woman who gets the better of a privileged but dim-witted villain”

THREAD: The Tory leadership candidates as 90s British cars. JEREMY HUNT: Ford Mondeo. Zero edge no matter how slick the design is. There was talk that they listed to the left but they want everyone to know they’ve DEFINITELY fixed that now.

“I want a heart.” “I want courage.” “If I only had a brain.”

Shocking video has emerged of GB News’ Dan Wootton STEALING flowers from outside Buckingham Palace.

Vote Reggie

34 years ago today, Sgt. Al Powell helped stop a terrorist attack at Nakatomi Plaza in Los Angeles. May his bravery never be forgotten.

Haha, Idiot! That was ages ago.

Blizzard in Buffalo NY. Time lapse 48 hours in 60 seconds.

A reminder for friends and fellow travellers (and anyone of intelligent good will really) that my Substack - "Notes from the Underground" - will launch tomorrow. If you like this idea, please retweet.

I can’t stop watching this. 😂 x.com/damocrat/statu…

“Tell Jabba I’ve got his money”

FRANCE: we're fancy WORLD: ok FRANCE: a fried ham sandwich is our national lunch WORLD: FRANCE: a fried ham sandwich with an egg is its wife