If you forget your moms friends name, there's a one in 2 chance it's Mary.

I'll be there in a hot minute

Well well well it seems like Mr Moseby knows a bit more than we think....

ARw cars living things 😌❤️

What does that even fucking mean

My favourite hobby to do on the motorway is to stare back at all the French pricks who stare at us while passing us out. It's actually really fun.

No need to be mean, baby

Who's that chick that's rockin kicks...😳🙊

I learn something relatively new everyday how amacing

One should make a secret language upon which only one other individual can understand, hence making it secret. That really should happen. Absolute fucking genius

It was 5.30 pm. I said to my friend that I want a sandwich. She goes... "WHAT, ITS HALF FIVE???" ..... Some people are so rude, all I wanted was a sandwich, for all she knew I could have been starving. .... ###

Why can I hear "I'm really nervous" in an australian accent so clearly in my head

Does anyone else's mom just refuse to open the windows, it's always "no the air conditioning is on" THE AIR CONDITIONING DOESNT MAKE A FUCKING DIFFERENCE

*Spongebob* Me: *crosses legs*

here I’ve seen many ants with wings, not flys, ants with wings, what a crazy world this is coming to

After about 8 years in practice, I still have yet to master the art of painting my right hand

Slowly but surely day by day losing my mind

I could not tell you one good thing that has happened in the last two weeks other than Mary taking a shot before her German oral

Favourite word in the whole English language: cub. By 1000 miles. Cub. Just say it you'll like it. Cub. Cub...

RUE YOU CARLEY SHAY RUE YOU