Amazon investor: Noooo $AMZN stock got downgraded by JPMorgan🤬 Roblox investor: The new Charlie Kirk simulator will increase profits🤔

I put the Spotted Cow in a baby bottle so I can go off the rails while sucking on a realistic nipple

Racist Gunna: Speed in the coupe Jeff Gordon, I want hispanics deported!🎶🎤

The ten beers in my bladder fighting to get through the ounce of dried semen in my urethra:

I just called my dentist to ask how many teeth I have

NFL dudes be like: Tua Tunga Vy Loah

Suicide by tornado

Wait, so the white whore had both soap AND sleigh???

Christmas mfs really be eatin ‘figgy pudding’ 🤢🤮 Holy #goyslop

They think I’m a marine the way I don’t shower but still make my bed

Asking the flight attendant if it would be possible to go faster

The snow storm was a ploy by JD Vance to exterminate homeless people

Tennis is actually the cheat code to every racket sport. Once you master the Ten’, the world is your oyster…

Dickle Down Freakonomics

You don’t even take your own advice you like a dentist wit veneers

Calling the cop who pulled me over “Your Honor”

The bigger the cushion, the better the pushin

There aren’t as many bugs anymore. There used to be a whole buncha bugs and nowadays I can’t find them.

First dude to make AI was like “Muahahahahh!!! It’s alive!!!”