I'm currently re arranging my sock drawer , phew it's hard work ! I've got 28 pairs of black and 1 spare white one ! Rock N Roll !

Watching #XFactor , I'm shaking my booty big time to that boy with funny hair that looks like rats tails , he's great !

I usually go to bed around 8pm as I have to be up early to interview deadbeats on TV , but Holly is round and we are playing Monopoly

Here's a picture of me using a big phone

Just bought a lovely new sweater from Marks and Spencer

Here's a picture of me laughing at balloons

A picture of me interviewing Barbara Windsor

Here I am stood by a big cube

A recent photo of me on holiday in Butlins , Skegness

Here I am before using Colgate

Just paused #XFactor so I can go for a poo

#EMA2013 When's Nickleback coming on ? They ROCK !

#XFactor I'm going to have a very stern word with the UK public tomorrow morning for that shower of shite vote !

It's been a very productive night , I've counted all my colouring pencils and I've got 248 , I've colour coded them now as well , Rock On !

#MoaningOfLife When you grab a nice pencil from you're vast collection and the point is blunt !

Just finished washing the dishes , it's a roller coaster here at Scoffield Towers

Just spotted a lovely new clipboard in Staples window , I wonder if I can sneak it past my wife ? Ooh I'm so wicked sometimes !

Of course I want hot fudge on my ice cream cone you stupid motherfucker.

I'll put all my eggs in one basket, I don't give a fuck

Well I'm off to bed now with a mug of Ovaltine and a Pukka Pad