I'm old school I can't TikTok. I can't Snapchat. I don't know anyone named "Stan" and I think BTS is a kind of digestive disease. But I can write in cursive. I can do math without an "app". I can dance, and sing, and love. I can be... me.

People who have the last name Burger had some hungry ass ancestors

Just tried alcohol for the first time and I'm feeling so confident and extroverted. I think I should do this every day for the rest of my life

Just took a shit at planet fitness just to then find out that theirs no fucking toilet paper. I blame Patrick Mahomes and the refs

Roomate just got a life sized thon maker poster

save me - chief keef

wonder what jalen hurts gonna do after this? Prolly fuck some bad hoes fr😭Maybe do a money spread😭 Ooh he so tuff bruh😭Jalen so tuff he probably throwing up 4's and posting up with baddies in the strip club😭😭😭Just throwing his money around cuz who cares cuz hes got so much

You have eight hours to eat this You can pause the clock (the food will stay warm) for 70,000 and if you don't finish you still get 35,000. Would you accept?

im on a walk in the depths of the appalachian mountains. the dense fog is whispering to me and i hear human-like screams in the distance

So I Just Got Circumcised Today🤟#NewDickWhoDis #ITookTheTopOffTheMaybach

Can’t wait for them to add AntMan to Marvel Rivals so I can make myself really small and then climb up the Hulks butt and then go giant mode

Portland is just Gotham with no hero’s

You are my sunshine, my only sunshine You make me happy hen skies are gray

Writing Bible 2 rn

Pooping so fucking awesome

Music: On Jerk: Off

You guys think Mister Fantastic stretches his dong during sex? I mean

damn im on my greg shit, I'm a wimpy kid damn im on my rowley shit, can't stop touchin cheese damn i'm fregly shit, secret freckle

Don’t eat the Dubai Chocolate from Menards. I can’t bend my arms or legs!!!