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Imagine being bullied into apologizing about grieving someone you idolized as a kid

Lack of discipline is the reason behind every single L I’ve taken in life

Your greatest act of rebellion is to be moral, healthy and hot.

Why is every single zoomer couple a land whale girlfriend and a bean pole boyfriend?

Middle Class wealth is a mirage. Your friend with the nice car? It’s financed. Your cousin’s vacation? On a credit card. Your coworker living “alone”? Three roommates you never see. This is the real America. Struggling quietly, flexing publicly.

How does LA Fitness not have a dating app

New Suicide Boys album out. Big day for your friend who died in 2018

floor mattress are kind of classy with the right setup not many minds can comprehend this however because they have been poisoned by big bedframe

What’s your 10 beer plan, where do you see yourself after 10 beers?

Anybody else’s biological clock feeling like we should be watching college game day right now?

No one tells you that at 40 you no longer need an alarm clock to wake up between 5-7am.

yeah its called ‘a dive bar’

Fucking pissed smfh #RaiderNation

I’d like to report a robbery…

You don’t eat the fruit the day that you plant the seed

🎯

When my birthday happens in 2 months, it’s just another day. I’ll be 37 but identifying as 27 so I don’t look so bad knocking down these 23yr old tortas

It’s not body posi…unless there’s a belly button

Blue check marks when rent is due

These broccoli hair bros really be encouraging each other to take shirtless gym selfies. You have one job as a friend…and that’s to shut that shit down! Quit making eyes in the mirror #beaman