I feel like it’s hard to trust a girl named after a month

merry christmas and everything but holy fuck if u like to scream at the tv while the packers are playing go in the car and watch on ur phone

for damar hamlin I love you and God is with you brother

nothing like waking up at 3:30 to an empty britta filter sitting in the fride ill gladly take some tap water for the team Andrew Case tony loberger

#NewProfilePic

gotta love milwaukee motherfuckers pass me in a turn lane going 75 in a 30 with no license plate and their trunk open with no issues but god forbid i park outside of my house for more than a half hour

driving with AirPods in solves every problem i thought my car was having, drive smarter not harder ladies and gentlemen

just tried to spit a good size loogy out the window and it landed on my forearm. im pretty fricken ticked off right now

man i just wish i could dunk on my friends, call them names and hurt there feelings

yall would never guess the situation im in right now

I'm not a promiscuous guy by any means, but there's not a whole lot I wouldn't do for Arby's beef and cheddar right now

like a kid on Christmas

i don't think i would even let my dog hang around someone that captions there post "main character"

And you made me looossseee my self controllll

i think i’m starting to get a little too old for snap

discovered a discouraging lump on my sack of balls, quick google search took my worries away seems harmless

america has so much untapped potential, couples with a combined weight over 700+lbs should turn there love making into a renewable energy resource, gotta figure out how to harness that energy and heat some homes this winter!!!

any stray moms out there looking for a kick ass step dad ? (serious inquiries only)

disclaimer that step dad offer is revoked if your kid has diabetes or anger issues, grams gave me the run down on insulin prices and im not adding that to the budget

anyone willing to argue that spring water isn't the superior water?? looking for some respectful riff raff