aight Pat McAfee we see you 📝

wtf

wait what

THIS WILL BE THE MOST HISTORIC DAY IN TWITTER HISTORY HOLY SHIT ITS GONNA BE A BLOODBATH ALL DAY!!

MR Elon Musk it seems like a great time for you to do a podcast. we are mobile.

TRUMP’S EGO WILL NOT ALLOW HIM TO BACK DOWN. ELON’S KETAMINE MOLLY COCKTAIL WILL NOT ALLOW HIM TO BACK DOWN. WE WILL GO NUCLEAR HERE.

imagine waking up today as elon. the drugs have worn off. you’ve said UNSPEAKABLE things about your ex. you sunk your company stock and pissed off all your coworkers. you’re just laying there, looking at the ceiling.

hey guys just a heads up if you’re in a rush to get to the military vs. cartel battle today in west hollywood, there’s a massive gay pride parade on hollywood blvd. it just took me an hour to navigate around two abrams tanks and 4,000 transgender people to get to erewhon. day

this will scare so many people: 1. you can be an illegal immigrant and still be a great human. 2. we can handle the immigrant situation without mass deportations. 3. leftist looters, rioters, building-burners are pieces of shit and deserve punishment. 4. you can be a hardcore

people are filled with hate because, first and foremost, they hate themselves.

if you woke up today you got a lot to be thankful for.

15 years clean today. 15 years since i checked into a state-funded detox unit with very little hope for any kind of meaningful life. grateful every day for my journey, but more thankful for the number of people i have been able to impact with my story. the greatest gift from God.