Oh no! I’m the same me

People aren’t asking the right questions, like what flavor vape was Lauren Boebert smoking at Beetlejuice and why hasn’t a vape company come out with Beetle Juice flavored vapes?

The surprising lack of song covers by Gal Gadot and other celebrities, in these difficult times, is disappointing. Do better Hollywood.

Me when I tell my Mom my credit card debt is ‘fine’

"Arsenal of Democracy" is objectively the coolest way to say war profiteering

If you need more than a sentence to tell me who you’re dressed as, It’s a bad costume. It’s not a Halloween character, save the back story for your intro to acting class.

Every time an agency fires an actor for their stance on Israel. A Kanye gets their wings.

Women who self identify with Lana Del Ray are my type of toxic

There’s an insta-thot to defense contractor rep pipeline, that we’re not ready to talk about as a country

There’s no bad city for dating. People who think dating is good are now in relationships. The city isn’t the problem, it’s you (and me).

Nice try Zuckerberg, no matter how spicy the threads take is on my IG feed, I’m still not opening your CVS brand Twitter

Run club is Scientology for millennials

Who knew the adderall shortage would hit the White House too

Need an election night RedZone. Fox, CNN & MSNBC all on one screen

Can I say something now that Trump is president again… If I’m driving on a two lane and there’s a Waymo in front of me and your in the other lane driving the same speed as the Waymo so I can’t get past. I should be able to kill you

Ey girl, this Palisades forest fire got me thinking about the fire🔥 of our love 💕 that cleared the forest 🌲 my of defenses and set my heart ablaze 😘 They call us arson because when we’re together it’s all sparks ⚡️

If the tariff war with Canada goes anything like the Grammys. I think we goin be alright.

Girls be like “I want princess treatment”then I sell them off to a neighboring kingdom for defensive alliances and I’m the asshole

no girlfriend. gym 4 times a week. right shoulder hurts. same 2 friends. one delusional crush. life is good.