Cocaine bear probably doesn’t shit in the woods.

My favorite crowd work clips are the ones where the audience member says all the funny things and the comedian just says what they said back into the mic.

Hello, I am doing a longer stand up set that will be recorded tonight at Tucson Improv Movement (414 e. 9th st.) Please consider coming if you are in #Tucson. What do you think Whats Up Tucson?

This is what I’m talking about tonight!

Hogwarts is what I call herpes.

Yoshi is short for Yoshitonmychest

Do you have to get jumped in by MS 1-12 to get jumped into MS-13?

I work at factory assembling devices to change TV channels. It’s a remote job.

Tony Hawk’s last name is Pro Skater

I’m going to wait to get weed till tomorrow when they mark it down 50%

You’re either a front left burner user or you’re wrong

My pronouns are ac/ab

It’s great that Elon bought Twitter as a joke and it’s bombing

The Switch is BACK LIVE at hotelcongress! Come text I topics and watch comedians try and make it funny right before your very eyes! Whats Up Tucson wanna give them a preview of what they might see?

some of you have never dipped your hot dog in coffee and it shows

The human race has been going through a real tough spot these last couple thousands of years.

The Barbie movie will be this generations The Godfather, mark my words

Hey Whats Up Tucson wanna help me get folks to text in topics for comedians to make jokes about tonight at Hotel Congress? Cool, the number is (520)800-4426

Text in topics for jokes! 520-800-4426 And, here's a joke for your show! "What do you call a pile of cats?" A meow-ntain.😹

Bob Barker, Jimmy Buffet and Steve Harwell. Just like that my dream blunt rotation, gone.