Who was your favorite bald guy growing up? Mine was Michael Jordan

Watching Michael Jordan's Playground again. Used to watch it on vhs. It starts with samurai intro and then piano instrumental of glory.

Humans love to collect things, especially kids. I think rocks and sticks are better than plastics.

If you add pumpkin + a body part as an insult, it's terribly mean. I don't want to be mean mostly, but it could be devastating. Pumpkins are weird shapes, as are humans.

My buddy got a Messi jersey tattoo I saw for the first time tonight. (He's Argentine) I messed with him asking what's that for? Got a dead eye stare before laughter. Sometimes being aloof can get laughter.

Do women who get pedicures worry their DNA is being collected by Nail Shops? Too many crime shows? Hang in there

Is heaven for men wandering about like the men of Last of the Summer Wine? Boyish goofshit

I've grown to have a small appetite but many meals. I could live on appetizers throughout the day. Unless I want to nap, then I'll go big, which is still not that big. Don't know how other bodies do it.

Dips are a wonderful food invention. I could make and eat dips all day. Love it. (Not the tobacco) Spitting is impolite but still necessary for humans at times

Fun fact: pringles are great for people with bad or no teeth who still want chips. You can smash them with your tongue. They are so thin, and, if you're tired of only soup & baby food.

If you could be any celebrity who would you want to be? Me, Winnie-the-Pooh

Sometimes you want to feel like Margot Tenenebaum smoking a cigarette in the bath tub

Out in the backyard w kiddo finding owl pellets. Apparently, kiddo thought the owl pellets smelled like grandpa's tobacco. Then said maybe it's the fungus on it.

The water is running below a gentle sheet of ice

Did anyone else learn in school not to define a word by using the word you're defining? I guess that isn't a thing anymore. Just repeat it twice for emphasis and let them do their research.

Watched the movie #Nope again, still terrified of primates. Well done movie. Jordan Peele does mastery work.

alsalam ealaykum warahmat allah wabarakatuh 🙋🙋 #Ramadan Kareem to all 💥💥 #Please I need your help to treat my #child and provide some #food for my children🙏💔🫀 This is the #donation link, through which you can #send your #help ⬇️⬇️ paypal.com/donate/?hosted…

Ever tell someone you didn't recognize them because their hair looks great? Then they remind you, 3 weeks ago they told you, they are doing chemo & it's a wig. I leaned into the compliment. Be kind to your acquaintances who care about you, even if you have a trash memory

Are comedians doing more crowd work because they need to reach out from lack of close friends, or daily experiences, or is this just trying to move back into society post pandemic trend? #discuss

Backyard forecast: snowy and mud and #JeepMafia