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My finest parenting moment is when I sent my son to daycare in a jean jumpsuit and then at pickup, his shy teacher whispered “the jean jumpsuit was a sensation” and informed me that word had spread throughout the school and teachers were traveling from other classrooms to see it

The alternate definition of the verb, ‘tweet’, as in, ‘to make a posting on the Twitter online message service’, is in the actual dictionary. No other social media app has anything like it. Imagine disposing of that level of brand recognition because of a mid-life crisis.

thinking of every business that, after a decade of societal shifts, finally made a twitter account & started putting the twitter logo on all of their menus, signage, branding, ads, etc.

The visuals are soooooo sick but what is this song though? It could have gone so much harder.. why 😢

wild how art manages to get made at all. I have to clean my apartment so many times in life. never mind the times I have to walk somewhere. then, of course, I get hungry

girl ain’t nobody looking at twig one and two im looking at mother

This drag SENDS me

i wanna go sit in the sun at the park but my brain has convinced me that i’ll somehow do it wrong and everyone will point, laugh, set their dogs on me, garrotte me with their picnic blankets etc

this is the average senator

These games are getting out of hand

The Beefy Five Layer Burrito was $0.89 in 2009 on release, the same year the federal minimum wage was raised to $7.25/hr. Today that burrito is $3.69, over 4x the original price. Minimum wage is unchanged.

time to lock in

I got a great idea for you

#USAElections2024