Dear Boris Johnson, I'm available to lead an Inquiry into the UK government Covid-response at a very reasonable rate

Hey Boris Johnson

Right then, let's get started with this pandemic response plan

Good luck to everyone taking their A Level exams

I'd like to offer my services to run an inquiry into the parties in Downing Street last year & can assure everyone I didn't participate in any proscribed festivities. I was supposed to arrange the Annual Inquiry Crew Xmas bash, but never quite got round to it, so I'm clean

If anyone knows Sue Gray, please pass on my details as I have lots of hints and tips for her

Hi @SueGrayCO, let me know if you need any tips

An inquiry you say? I can have it finished on Jan 24 2023

It's good to be busy, and currently I'm working on Boris Johnson's exit plan

Oh I think Taylor Swift and Tom Hiddlestone make a wonderful couple. Best of luck to them and their new, blossoming love

My report 'What Does Brexit Actually Mean' will be released at some point soon(ish)

HAPPY HALLOWEEN EVERYONE WOOOOO SCARY STUFF

From everyone involved in the Iraq Inquiry we'd like to take this opportunity to wish you a very happy and safe fireworks night

Contemplating a job offer making Southern Rail services run in a more punctual and efficient manner

Just registered to vote in the General Election

Now David Davis MP, about those 58 Brexit Impact Studies I said I'd done for you? Were they urgent?

We can delay no more, I agree we need to tackle the menace of the Bolsheviks (as soon as we have completed a thorough investigation) x.com/andrewrosindel…

Wish someone had told me just not bothering to do the report was an option, would have saved me a lot of bother. Well played David Davis MP

Have I left it too late to get Mrs. Chilcott a Christmas present? Do you think the 24 hour garage will have something?