Do you remember when you joined X? I do! #MyXAnniversary

What I'll be dining on underground with Edgar Friendly after society starts using the three seashells. IYKYK

Soon to go pro bowler...

I don't care what anyone says, the last half of the "Poker Face" chorus is "puh-puh-puh poker face, fuh-fuh fuck her face." Fight me. Try unhearing that now, monkeys!

Fuck...now I guess my next of kin can't sue the mouse house if their food kills me.

Choose wisely.

Man, "You Oughtta Know" by Alanis Morissette is 30 years old now. THIRTY! Here's what still kills me: Alanis: "AND ARE YOU THINKING OF ME WHEN YOOOOU FUCK HER???: Him:

This still cracks me up.

BDSM: "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but whips and chains excite me."

Give this one about...what...20? 30 years?

What's the supply of goth girlfriends? Am I able to get Sydney and 25 goth girlfriends? I need these details before I can make my decision.

Take your pick, Janelle Waz . 😁🤣

Then the plot twist...he tells you it's NOT a haunted house....... ......but it's going to be.

Advice for the day:

Advice for the day:

T.G.I.M.F.F., M.F.ers. Hope you all have a good M.F.in' day!