The safest I am as a driver is when I’m intoxicated. No music, two hands on the wheel, following all traffic laws. Any other time I’m driving, I’m on Instagram Reels or Twitter. Sometimes I even watch YouTube.

How it feels staying in your college town over summer

For my 60 followers special I will be enjoying this #thx #ferda #elliotthayes

God bless America

Birthday Plans 8 AM 💦🍆✊🏼 9 AM 😴🛏️ 10 AM 😴🛏️ 11 AM 💦🍆✊🏼 12 PM ❄️🍻 1 PM🫃🤵‍♀️ 2 PM ❄️🍺 3 PM ❄️🍺 4 PM ❄️🍺 5 PM ❄️🍺 6 PM 🌭🦧 7 PM ❄️🍺 8 PM ❄️🍺 9 PM ❄️🍺 10 PM 🥩🥃❄️ 11 PM 🥩🥃❄️ 12 AM 🗣️🦻🏻😑 1 AM 🤜🏻👱🏼‍♀️ 2 AM 👮🏼‍♂️🚓

Just one of those days….

6am uber humbles you 😹

Was longing for the ex wife

My lil bro will pork anything 😹 I respect it

Her priv story name is “🪩🐆💋🍸” she is NOT a good person

That 5am uber got me thinking about everything bad I’ve done

plug getting a booty call #lank

Lane Kiffin you did this to me 💔💔

SOX ML #gimmedat quindarious “Q-Balls” gooch

Happy bday to myself? Johnnydrama

6am uber said im up early yeah im a go getter

Told the bartender it was my bday and she said I could only have one fishbowl marg wtffff