[MI6 offices] MY BOSS: no ARIADNE BLACK: [me] why not MY BOSS: cover names are supposed to be inconspicuous SAMANTHA SHARP: [also me] are these not MY BOSS: you’re just picking names you think sound sexy and intriguing ALEXA STRAP-ON: [still me] no I’m not

UWU CATGIRL JUDGE: uuuuuu I am sentencing u to wife impwisonment ME: :) MY LAWYER: [leaning over and whispering in my ear] ME: :/

starting a dick rating service where you dm me your penis and i rate it using a single emoji i will never explain what the emoji means and you will descend into madness trying to figure out what my actual opinion is

for your consideration and later use

Claiming to be frightened by the name "Gaza", a real place that exists where real people live, kinda gives the game away that you simply think the place and its people shouldn't exist

Probably the most depressed I’ve ever been in my life except for a bunch of other times

as somebody currently wearing a 'Soup Time' shirt i can confirm they are good shirts

sometimes a Boonta Vista 🌴 episode title is so good your eyes roll back into your head like somebody is using one of those head scratchers on you

i need more friends that i can bombard with my inane bullshit at 1 in the morning

RIP sexy Marxist Jesus

i don't know. jesus christ i don't fucking know.

Go watch TOBY DAMMIT right now! It’s 43 of the greatest minutes of both Fellini’s filmmaking and horror as a genre, and Stamp’s lead performance is a huge part of that

incest century part 1,000,000

plans for today

cum

Another icon of the postwar period when the working class was at its cultural zenith. Son of a tugboat stoker from Stepney. Film careers such as Stamp's are no longer accessible to working class kids in the way they were to Stamp and his generation.

I mean it’s what I wanted but of course they still have to misgender me

Lower stakes than political misinformation, but there are seemingly A.I. written entertainment articles that just make up entire quotes. It's not even someone else's writing wrongly attributed to me, it's an entirely made-up sentence that doesn't appear anywhere else online.

stop me if you’ve heard this one before | patreon.com/lubchansky

Been waiting a week to find out my surgery dates and it's taking all my willpower not to "u up???" the surgeon