the good thing about OCD is i can confirm after staring at this candle for 3 minutes that it is completely out. wait. is it though

Beautiful food calms the nervous system. Research shows that the cephalic phase of digestion begins with sight and smell, priming enzymes, bile, and stomach acid before the first bite. When we eat food that looks vibrant, the body shifts into parasympathetic mode, improving

Went to get a Covid test and a giant broccoli man walked by the door

my roman empire is the unsuccessful 1980s new york police training program that revolved around giving seals guns

Who needs a birkin when you have a slice of buttered bread???

just found out my mom has been accidentally putting this whiskey in her coffee every day thinking it’s a flavored syrup

My friend lived with a girl that was poly and she had a white dreadlock boyfriend that did fire twirling and then he met her other boyfriend and it was a second white dreadlock guy who did fire twirling

Discovered a single, pure white eyebrow hair today. Was it there yesterday? No. Did it grow overnight? Absofuckinglutely

Hounslow council have banned Lime bikes, and licensed Forest and Voi; neighbouring Richmond has licensed Lime and banned the others. So every bridge is Checkpoint Charlie, with loads of Lime bikes parked on one side and loads of Forest and Voi on the other. Top work everyone!

The view from the bridge. Ebury Bridge, Pimlico, London. The colours on that night were just the most perfect I’d seen and I’ve been here many times. Some people ask if they can buy my photos they like on here. Yes you can. The high resolution files are ridiculously good value

nick the show will run for 10 years

I originally decided to make one of my little seabirds because I wanted one for myself, but I quickly fell in love with making them. Because each one is hand sculpted and painted, every piece is unique in its own little way, yet together they make lovely flocks.

A customer was like “I don’t know is it too late in the afternoon to have caffeine?” and I riffed “it’s 8 AM somewhere!” and everybody laughed. I’m quitting this job in a month. where was this joke 2 years ago when I needed it. what’s the point of all this

One of the scariest things, to me, is when people are in a deteriorating situation that progressively undermines their ability to understand it, like when nitrogen narcosis makes it harder for a diver to recognize the warning signs of nitrogen narcosis.

Suspicious.

there's a weird kind of grief that comes with late august and i cant explain it

shockingly, it is also taking a woman’s bra off at the end of the day

august is like the Sunday of the year…things shifting and changing, time slipping, the past coming to the forefront… everything covered in nostalgia and indecipherable grief but also late afternoon sunlight and quiet acceptance

I made a stamp as a test for an idea, if it were your birthday would you like it if someone made a stamp for the place/name of your choosing. Imaginary land, the country of your pet, the town where you live?

Chiltern Railways trains sound like struggling sub woofers from a lost dimension. Insane bass. Intolerable pollution. Steampunk but make it unsexy.