Male Body Count: (Alternatively titled "Dating Advice for Women") The Male Equivalent of Body Count has long been theorized by many internet dating discourse pundits. Some insist that it is also body count. Some insist it is porn. Some insist it is how many women he has had

every hour of my life I spend like £14.54 on nothing in particular

know the grass is always greener elsewhere, but every brit i know that's recently gone holiday in europe has said how much better the vibes and culture is to the uk, and how much they want to stay lol

Me, a boring English cunt with an email job, enjoying the vibes of a cool European city: I should move here and wreck this.

im afraid of being poor, of dying as wretched as i lived, without having contributed anything to anyone

Italian colleague in the restaurant just asked me if I'm gay, after working with me for three days. Me: "Yes, of course, very! It's obvious!" Her: "Well, some English people have that kind of voice and are straight"

Young men who work remote will never get the formative experience of listening to their middle aged coworkers complain about their marital issues after 1 beer

Very into this couple on Grand Designs who have failed to make any bedrooms for their two teenage daughters but did travel to Marrakech to personally oversee the design of about 25 small tiles for the kitchen floor

can i say something without everyone getting mad at me? this meme format sucks. its never been funny once

I love women because they are either thinking about skincare or death.

as a 27 year old i can say that some 27 year olds want to be 35 and others want to be 23 but none of them want to be 27

I often think about George Harrison, being in a band with two of the world’s best songwriters Lennon and McCartney (no pressure) and then just coming up with Something, (Frank Sinatra’s favourite song) Here Comes the Sun and While my Guitar Gently Weeps.

I love Spotify Wrapped day. everyone gives up on cognitive security entirely

Fitting in one last midnight TikTok of a horse having its shoe adjusted before my boyfriend leaves me forever

so does anyone actually read Chiles columns or do they just screenshot the headline, post "he's at the top of his game" and then go about their day

let me tell you, taking the lords name in vain would’ve been the least of the crimes I committed that day

you are not court philosopher material, you are village priest material

If I ever became a drag artist, I would have to call myself “Fiscal Drag”.