“MISTAKE” is one of the most overused excuses on earth If u r in a relationship and the other person consistently apologies for their “mistake” in some form of treatment or behavior they do to you , if it’s happened more than once , it’s not a mistake ...it’s a DECISION #maxout

Last night on the bus there was a bra on the seat next to me and everyone kept glaring at me like I'd put my bra there so I could have two seats.

Be soul food. Not eye candy.

Being lactose intolerant does not make you special.

If you never try something new and fail, you're not brave. Fall flat on your face over and over again, get up, try again. Now that's courage

What if you focus on changing just one person's world.

Sitting on my couch with my feet on the kitchen counter, I realize my apartment is quite small..

To be clear: M&S believe that the 'MUST HAVES' are: For MEN: 'outfits to impress' For WOMEN: 'fancy little knickers' Imagine for a moment if those window displays were reversed. Go on M&S .... we are watching. PS Who signed this off? #sexist #marksandspencer

I woke up to find my cat had taken a dump in front of the bookshelf, then stacked four books on top. He's a fan of the old classics.

It hurts to be this modest.

I love how babies will scream bloody murder for 20 minutes, fart for 20 seconds, and then happily go about their day...

I was not expecting this many fingers up my nose. #momlife

Vagina tweets are still popular I see..

I'd like twitter to make an audio version for when I can't look at the screen.

If you feel like your life is moving too fast, try farting in an elevator.

Mood: Only reading short tweets

Friend: I love how warm it is! Me: Yeah global warmi- Friend: And did you see how low gas prices are! Me: Because the Saudis are flooding the market to start a price war with Rus- Friend: Everything is awesome!

twitter: yelling into the void joke twitter: yelling into the void but with friends. u can hear their yelling and they can hear urs, and they support you. “that was a good yell,” they say