Robot companions

Looks like the MSTR train is running out of coal.

GM, degens ☕️ Woke up to my portfolio seeing how low it can go. Who’s FOMO’ing into these dips in hopes that this is the bottom and who thinks we’re going lower?

Shill me hot memecoins. Must be under $1K MC Must be mooning to $1T MC

The NFT space is never dull and always serves up a daily dose of drama the rivals reality show grand finales. It might be one of life’s guilty pleasures.

My NFT bags got me living the dream. Rock’n that “Crypto Rich” t-shirt so the other tenants recognize my game.

Crypto bro out here flexing that Googled Porsche-and-private-jet pic hard. Word of advice, don’t grab one of the first images that pops up if you’re going to play rich.

Crypto didn’t blast off to the moon today—guess the influencers forgot to check their Magic 8-Ball! Must’ve scribbled “parabolic” on the wrong day in their crayon-covered calendars. Lucky for them, they just parrot the same tired hype every day to boost their batting average.

GM degens ☕️ Which projects are we gambling our last bit of crypto on today? Shill me the memecoin and NFT projects you are upside down on and are trying to exit.

How’s everyone’s $YZY adventure going? Another day, another glorious pump-and-dump. Where on the chart did you get gloriously wrecked? Memecoin crashed harder and faster than Kanye posting on X.

How to score loans for crypto: Walk into bank wearing shades while tossing around “blockchain” Pitch “digital gold” 154 slide PowerPoint on crypto Pump fear of missing out Say you already sold a kidney Tell them you’ll repay when it hits $1M Bonus: say you work with Kanye

Now I can tweet the doltish thoughts running through my brain with blue check swagger.

When someone says “crypto is going to moon as adoption grows”, I think “Well duh, Captain Obvious.” What will your next mind blowing epiphany be, water is wet?

Guard your crypto—scammers are hungrier than a Nigerian Prince spamming your inbox.

Time to master the art of “accidentally.”

Oh boy, here’s to all of the next level things I will think of creating but never complete.

NFT projects tossing out 1/3 of their whitelist for free, then cranking the public mint price to the moon. Shocked when flippers tank the floor? Congrats, you played yourself.

Taking a page from the ladies and flexing my melons to rack up more followers. Most of those accounts are probably dudes anyway, so why not? Follow me for more gems like this.

GN degens