Your town hall rushed. Your elixir empty. They'll kill you

horsemonkey horsemonkey you are the gallop monkey. horsemoneky horsemonkey you are the legged monkey. togethermonkey togethermonkey we are the prancemonkey monkey.

i have been using excel for the first time and it is scary that the world relies on such a shit piece of software to spin on its axis

Call me 360 no scope the way my Banks not FaZed by these purchases I'm making on my Optics. #trickshot

If you think the Minecraft movie should have been animated your a weeb #flintandsteel

Shadow boxing my microwave as it heats up my milk #bluemilk

british 'people' making an edgy joke; haha remember 11/9???

Computer science is crazy. It will have you hating on allan turing more than the Nazis he helped defeat

There are people in the world who haven't tried Mama's, and I find that really sad.

Notes of updog

I might be the LeBron James of ballet and we will never know

One day you will nade stack banana for the last time

I got some big shoes to fill #yep #IBoughtTheWrongSize

Why did they name this whole device after one pre installed app that no one uses

He looks like he would sell me fridge magnets for a fair and just price

Trying to figure out who spiked my jager bomb, 3 proseccos, and 12 cocktails

I could not go back in time, They would scalp me for my apple and watermelon flavoured hair and wear it as a bonnet

Just been awarded my medal of unemployment

My chungus life flashed before my very eyes