Crofty: "I was talking to Ricky Martin of the Kaiser Chiefs" This is, quite possibly, the greatest piece of motorsports commentary since Walker. #SkyF1

"Look at this graining, it's like... long grain rice of tyre rubber." Ted Kravitz is broadcasting royalty and deserves a knighthood. #F1

Ed Balls

Something in you Lit up heaven in me

I'm so excited for this - DayC is the reason I started watching Twitch in the first place, and I got addicted to watching his RE3 speedruns. Wednesday is going to be boss.

To my next door neighbours who bought their kids whistles on the morning of my day off: Thank you for justifying my inevitable decision to bounce home pissed at 3am tomorrow night singing the Bobby Firmino song

I might be the only bloke at this My Chemical Romance gig tonight that will spend the whole gig just nervous about the match tomorrow. Oh well. At least I'll be nervous with a kickin' emo soundtrack.

Don’t let UEFA deflect the blame away from themselves. This is on them.

Life is good right now. I'm in a good career, earning good money in a dream job with my dream missus, and everyone's in OK health. Had to remind myself of all this during the second half, but it helped.

How amazing is it that the biggest disappointment of this season is that we "only" did the double. These are the days. Up the fucking reds. Yes I've been drinking.

'Sam, hi, listen, can you do me a favour? Buy some flowers for Boris Johnson, delivered to number 10 this evening with a card that says "Sorry you had to go, but let's face it, you are a fucking waste of skin." Waste of skin, yeah.'

So er, I just got a Twitch payout, even though I haven't streamed in 6 months. If you're nuts/forgetful enough to remain subscribed through this void, I love and appreciate you. And I've had some really lovely words recently from good friends. Should... should I stream again??🤔

Coincidentally, 40.2 is the average IQ of anyone who has recently used the phrase "this is nothing compared to 1976"

"Murderers" sing the City fans. Welcome to the new season, everybody

Glasgow: anthem booed Ireland: anthem booed Sporting/Spurs match: silence booed Anfield: impeccably observed, save for 3 people in a crowd of 55,000. Trending? Hillsborough.

Booked a hotel for the Manchester leg of Blink-182's new tour and tickets aren't even out yet. I am in my mid-thirties.

In 2007, when Gordon Brown replaced Tony Blair, the Conservatives called for a snap general election. Boris Johnson wrote a piece in the Telegraph describing the change as a "palace coup" and a "North Korean" move that "trampled on the democratic will of the British people."