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Chinese Riddle: If a man does not tweet does he exist?

I would have put David Chappelle as my name, but it was taken. F'n impostors. This is my second tweet ever. Can I follow myself?

Going to top 80 degrees here in OH today. I'll be on my motorcycle. Man, am I edgy! I'll post a picture of how dope I am.

As promised- here's a staged candid shot of me having deep thoughts whilst on my motorcycle.

I am up to 4 followers! It's been a great ride!

Like I have anticipated- my following has more than doubled to eleven people. The power of visualization....

I'm off to the gym. Replacing good character with good looks is a cornerstone of my comeback stratagem. (sarcasm)

Does anybody read this? Let's get to 100 followers. Shout out to the magnificent 11.

I can't think of anything provocative to tweet, and yet, I must continue... Must...keep....tweeting.

Why'd twitter change my picture to an egg?

This account has been hacked. I'm deeming it officially bogus. Sincerely, Chappelle, David K