Just so all you non-COOP kids out there remember: All the Chinese chemicals are filled with corona. COOP Chems are the only safe ones.

3,696 calls before 7:29 am. Yeah, famas are ready to roll.

The last time some tried to standup to the Germans they... nvm. Have fun.

I opened up a jug of #lexarEZ from SyngentaUS and got COVID19. Thanks a lot #ChemChina

This year Randy The Intern, CCA and I sorted seed. You got milo for seed corn isolation? Let’s just throw that on top of your long season corn. Those numbers you ordered in December. Ran out. But I substituted it for a better NK Seeds number.

BradSpiracy: COVID19 has been around for 15 years. How do I know? Farmers have been distancing themselves from me for that long.

New twitter policy: I’m only following hot chemical reps. Starting with: (comment hotties below) Hit the bricks Wendy@Winfield you leather faced hag.

Ascend pro for corn is like viagra for pioneer salesmen. It’s needed. Don’t @ me.

Meanwhile farmers outside of Bayer HQ...

Well followers. Randy The Intern, CCA, Billy the Operator, CCA, and I have been called for crowd control at Bayer HQ. Billy’s currently welding a grill guard on the dry tender truck. #prayforus

Winds goes above 8 mph on the DKC 64-34 and I’m like...

Reminder: no refunds.

Ugh it’s that time of year when Golden Harvest Seeds says “they can compete”.

Welp who wants a visit? I’ve got off brand Mountain Dew and granola bars. #nothingbutthebest

Pioneer seeds are just glorified cover crops. There I said it.

People say that us COOP guys are the worst. Psshhhh. People that don’t calibrate their yield monitors yet send out pictures, now those are terrible people.

It’s #COOPPrimeDay call now for deals on Flexstar, AgSaver, AND ULTRA BLAZER.

Keep your comments to yourself Karen.

Even Biden is sick of #FBN ads.