Hey man. Your roommate says you've been thinking about killing yourself. Just thinking right? Only thinking about it? Ok man just checking in. Peace.

I don’t really care I have other shit going on

Today is my first day at AWS. I noticed a small bug in DynamoDB clustering implementation and I think I fixed it. Shipped to prod already. Going to make a coffee and will check back if everything is working.

How are they even finding these ones

Im at the Chinese buffet by myself phone on 3% I never gave a fuckkkk

53 YEARS AGO on October 21, 1972, "My Ding-a-Ling" by Chuck Berry reached #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 chart.

New mixtape called sissy gay bitch ass puppy is droppin soon

U as a male should be gaping yo BOOTYHOLE

SPACEGHOSTPURRP DINGALING MUSIC💿 🚨SOON🚨👀

please Dave blunts, please ride my wee wee

Who tf invented the term “ cocker doodle doo “, ?

U ever seen a male cry ? Bitch U EVER SEEN A MALE SHAKE HIS ASS CHEEKS FROM LEFT TO RIGHT AT 200MPH, ?

Lucky number

Me and justin bieber watching flapjack.

I stopped playing video games in the 90s once I realized that Patman couldn't wear jeans.. it just made me profoundly sad.