Forgot that the buses are running at a different time this weekend in honour of the Balrog mortally wounding Jesus and Jesus returning as The White Wizard.

Typical McGill's, last bus home and it's broken down in the bus station.

Love repacking my hiking gear just before I head on the trail while watching less experienced hikers listing their gear on YouTube. I'm not Ultra Light,but I'm so much lighter than them.

Starting to think the Durston ask their customers if they are gear snobs and will only sell tents to those that say yes.

Free drinks from Li, Alien Ant Farm.....am I still 17?

Every time I get this driver the bus bus "Breaks down". How do companies not pick up on this shite?

No going to do a USA and Storm Parliament, and will respect that the country voted austerity lite, but could we not just vote a party who care about people and the environment? #votegreen

Walking through what I thought was an empty shopping centre, whistling NIN "Perfect Drug", thought there was an echo....the echo keeps going when I stop....hope it's a cleaner or security or something.

Oasis Fans yet again prove they are worst cunts by gatekeeping music.

Order for pickup, come down in 30 minutes. Turn up after 35, "Aye, I'll make it after these other 3". Mate you're making me regret I didn't order dominos.

Bar in Riga is playing the Greatest Band of All Time #np "Pissing the night away,Pissing the night away" #chumbawumba

I'm writing a script for a comedy show about old men who live in the countryside through the history of middle earth. It's called Last of the Samirillion.

Only in Wetherspoons can you order a meal and not get your drink.

There's a guy on my bus that looks like Brian Quinn and had to go check that the driver wasn't Sal Vulcano or Murr

Imagine being so against human rights, so anti-life, that you try to influence people on another continent to be angry, because of something that doesn't affect you. #twat #hatersgonnahate

Pub in Ljubljana is playing 4 Star Mary....... it's a total blast from the past.

The "Inspection shelf" must be the worst idea in toilet history. And that comes from somebody who has used many a long drop and dug many cat hole.

Is there a hiker equivalent of Full kit wanker? Just seen a guy head to toe in North Face.

At a cover band's gig. They have played the 3 songs i know. My mate has went into the crowd. Would it be wrong to go to the chippy and meet him at the end?

Yeah. I'm done with Twitter. Bye!