THIS TEAM SUCKS!!! Mike Rhyner

Newborn Loses Faith In Humanity After Record 6 Days theonion.com/newborn-loses-…

ICE is really upset that local businesses in Chicago and Seattle won’t let them use the potty and I just have to admit, I apologize to the 3rd Amendment for previously underestimating its importance

Why do we only have 14 SOG? I just turned the game on. #WPGvsDAL #GoJetsGo

#TUQUETRICK!!! #GoJetsGo #WPGvsDAL

Dunedin, FL, early March… Jays Staff: What are your goals for this year, Terry? Yesavage: It’s “Trey,” and I’m going to be the motherfucking World Series MVP.

Meanwhile on Reddit: reddit.com/r/IAmA/s/Dn2gn…

I’m going to watch The Eternals now. #PrayForMojo

Dear Mr. President if you'd like to call into my sports show today as well I have some questions

Dear #TartanArmy, If #Scotland plays in Dallas-Fort Worth, I’m willing to let a few of you tent it in my backyard. Price negotiable, but will most certainly include a bottle of Buckfast and a ticket to the match (wife will drive to & from stadium). Love, Gord PS - I’m not kidding

White House Begins Christmas Season With Ceremonial Lighting Of Cross

She’s a Dreamer from the big city, laying low in a small town, making the most gorgeous gingerbread houses at her cousin’s cookie shop. He’s a grizzled, disillusioned ICE agent who’s been tasked to bring her in. Watch “Forbidden Frosting,” Tues. at 8:00 on the Hallmark Channel.

Pope Leo said in a Christmas Eve sermon that the story of Jesus being born in a stable because there was no room at an inn should remind Christians that refusing to help the poor and strangers today is tantamount to rejecting God himself. For Reuters reuters.com/world/pope-leo…

I did not watch the Puppy Bowl last night. I watched the All-American Puppy Bowl. It was crazy when Kristi Noem executed all the puppies. Should have seen that coming I guess.

Don’t mind me, but I’m having the most aggressively Canadian Saturday night possible. Watched the Olympic men’s curling gold medal match, followed by bingeing Shoresy.

Who’s with me? What do you say, MLB and SABR? #BallsDeep #ABS #MLB

The Texas Rangers are literally celebrating a segregationist.

For every 1000 likes I’ll make Donald trump's face dirtier...