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Quick work

My children watching Sunisa lee on floor: 2yo: She’s really wiggling! 5yo: She’s the best at sparkling.

The bid/ask on Shapiro right now 👀

HBO is trying to get in on the Walz news cycle too

Clinton seems so personally insulted by the existence of Donald Trump. It’s good.

Happy dads one-upping each other with kid photos in the group chat day to all who celebrate

Kamala Harris on Hot Ones when

Absolutely ecstatic to announce that my debut novel is being published by Penguin Random House 🐧🏠📚! Have never worked harder on or been prouder of anything in all my writing days. I can’t wait for you to read RETRO 💫

All beers should be orderable by color

A real one-two here

Silo is a funny show because exactly half the actors are pretty good and the other half are utter dogshit, the worst you’ve ever seen

The single biggest ticket item is a DHS contract listed as saving $8 billion. Wow, that's a huge contract! Actually no, it's $8 million. They must have tried to automate scraping the FPDS form and failed. That means we're down to $8.5B in savings. 3/

Trump crash plane Trump take egg Trump kill Hooters

Mercedes should be paying for airtime for every time I finish one Jon Hamm’s voiceover monologues with “the best or nothing” while watching Your Friends and Neighbors