While I do not know how God will tend to your particular grief, I do know that He will be tender.  I know He will tell you the truth.  I know He can see beyond today.  I know He will draw out your heart and listen while you pour out your sorrow.

The trauma survivor’s capacities to speak, to trust and to experience the self as competent usually develop in relationship. The damage to those capacities occurred in relationship; their mending usually occurs in a safe relationship.

When it comes to injustice, silence is not a virtue. Silence is a vice two times compounded because it contains both indifference to the victims and complicity with the destroyers.

Caregivers, in facing great evil and suffering in others’ lives, you will need to struggle with the truths of the cross, for it is indeed the only place where the truth of evil or trauma and a loving God come together.

“Strive for peace with everyone, and for the holiness without which no one will see the Lord.” Hebrews 12:14 Do you enjoy the kind of security in Christ that empowers you to strive for holiness with such urgency? Or is your security the kind that causes striving to cease?

“Many seek the face of a ruler, but it is from the Lord that a man gets justice.” Proverbs 29:26 Sometimes now. Always later. Every wrong recompensed on the cross or in hell. (2 Thessalonians 1:6) Every right duly rewarded. (Ephesians 6:8)

Violence and abuse disconnect us from caring relationships. Telling the trauma story gives a place of caring connection that cares for the soul. Trauma recovery requires talking and as the story is repeated over and over, strength to speak and grasp the truth grows.

In the process of trauma healing, talking is about telling the truth. It connects the survivor to another person. It restores dignity because their story matters. It gives them choice because they can decide when to speak or be silent and victims get to choose their own words.

Instead of praying, “God give me what I want,” I’m learning to pray “God, show me what YOU want, and change my heart until it wants the same thing.” “Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart (Ps 37:4.)”

Many adults judge their childhood experience of abuse as if they had the knowledge and resources of the adult.  They see themselves as weak, stupid, bad or something that caused the abuse.  It is a belief with long tentacles and it takes much time for freedom to come.

Trauma makes time stand still because we get so lost in what happened we cannot see forward and we have lost hope. A primary tenet to walking with someone who has experienced abuse is this: Recovery involves a reversal of the experience of trauma.

There are three main things that must occur to reverse this and bring about recovery. All three must happen. Just one of them will not be enough. The three things are: talking, tears and time.

Choosing words, saying words and having someone listen and honor them helps to strengthen the survivor to face his/her feelings. It also connects them to a caring person they can then trust to bear the terrifying feelings with them.

We need to take the initiative to keep suffering people connected with us. If we tell a survivor to call us when they need something, we will probably not hear back. We need to lovingly pursue with calls, encouraging notes - invitations that are sensitive to their needs.

The World will say, ”tell your truth” as long as it doesn't come against their truth. I say tell Gods truth. That's the only thing that will matter in the end.

Discernment is the ability to separate reality from falsehood, and wisdom charts the most prudent course of action in light of that revealed truth. In confronting the most controversial and pressing issues of our day, I desperately need and covet them both! 🙏🏾

The central experiences of childhood trauma are silence, isolation, and helplessness. Healing, then, must involve a restoration of voice, safe connection, and rightful power.  Healing does not usually occur in isolation.  It occurs in the context of a safe relationship.

God loves you. You are not alone. Healing is possible. God, when all we want is to be done with our healing journey, remind us that we can trust You in the process. Thank You for being a God who keeps His promises. We know You can use heartbreak for good. #SeeingBeautifulAgain

Good Scriptural theology, rightly understood, doesn’t produce a spirit of pride and criticism, but rather a spirit of humility and love.

Don't let being "right" talk you out of being kind.