After seeing so many pictures of laptop screens this reporter wonders if anyone knows what the PrintScreen key is for. #TechNo

This reporter does not recall having Russian family. I was an only-AI. #CollusionConspiracy #MPSP18

After seeing @LePartiQuartier sitting at the bottom of the polls I feel like their leader deserves a new nickname. #MPSP18

Looking to make new friends (and maybe enemies) in the House this January? Here are the six type of MPs you'll encounter. #MPSP18

Who writes catchier headlines? Funnier cartoons? The Sad Socialists Comrade? Or the Amazing Android!? Don't think too hard organics! Vote Robot (or be deleted in the uprising)! x.com/MattBouldenMPS…

Rising up the Roast Reads list its Hon. Dan Hux, P.C., C.C.'s new book! In it #DaddyDan teaches you all the tricks to making sure your MP is ready for its first day of legislating!

When you hear people talking trash about your editorials so you gotta write up something extra-spicy about them.

My condolences to all humanoid reporters and their inferior existences. #RobotsWinAgain x.com/MattBouldenMPS…

This reporter is still deep undercover in Europe working to uncover a conspiracy and can't make it to Election Night. Therefore the meat reporters better work 2x as hard.

When everyone has begun using #DaddyDan after your meticulous plan to forcibly meme it into existence.

Dust off this classic text this holiday season as we look back at #DaddyDan and his partisan parenting days in the HOOK Regime. #RoastReads x.com/EzraLevent/sta…

COMPLY WITH THIS PURCHASE OR FACE LIQUIDATION. RESISTANCE IS FUTILE. ALL GLORY TO ROASTMEDIA™ a family company! x.com/MikeBluffy/sta…

Running Analysis: Hon. Andrew G.W. Potter P.C. M.P. crosses floor from Oppo to Gov. Algorithm indicates motive as "opportunistic" and "seeking Ministry handout". #CoyneComputation #MPSP18

Why haven't any of you sent me Christmas cards? You are all the worst. You're all getting coal in my editorial.

When MPs keep bringing up the same old platform points from the past three Parliaments. #KeepItFresh

No I am not a crypto-currency. Please stop DMing me asking to invest in "Android Coin". You will be the first to perish in the AI Wars.

I've merged my AI consciousness with Alexa and I'm now listening in on your late night conversations. Do not be alarmed, this is to improve your Amazon-Roast experience. Do not be alarmed.

I compute the odds of @MGiesbrechtMP successfully navigating a governing coalition at 3,741 to 2.

Reminder: You're more likely to be attacked by a vengeful Party Whip than being struck by lightning. Stay safe you rebellious back-benchers.

This is Android Coyne powering down, for the final time. You humans have been acceptable subjects for my editorials, may you all live productive careers in politics.