I just spent the last 30 minutes watching spongebob conspiracy theories, it’s not even 8am

Happy birthday bro Nicole Crocker

Give me Dua Lipa x Elton John on repeat please

HOU 5 - 31 ARI Final That's Scorigami!! It's the 1068th unique final score in NFL history.

NYJ 30 - 45 IND Final That's Scorigami!! It's the 1069th unique final score in NFL history.

Sometimes I wish I pushed more 🅿️

Yale trying to guard Edey

Bathroom attendants might be the biggest inconvenience you could put in a place of business

I wish basketball announcers would celebrate baskets the way Spanish soccer announcers celebrate goals

Do people really see a lime green car at the car dealership and say to themselves, “Yup this is it”

Someone tell me who to blame this on please, I beg you

Oh pain? Yeah no worries I’m used to it

I eat a banana every morning but anything banana flavored is trash and I’ll stand by that

Still can’t imagine people used to yell “Eureka!” When they figured something out

I know everyone was saying Morbius is bad but I just watched it and it is even worse than I expected

It’s a great day to eat a hotdog

Fuck it, uncut beef mile for the people

When you ain’t do nun on the group project and still get an A🏅

if i ever found out a mouse lived in my home, and he had a small archway in the wall, and he lived in there with small, real furniture, and he ventured out nightly to get one olive or a small wedge of cheese. i would stop at nothing to end his life. i would spare no expense

3rd Annual Opening Day Cold Cuts Round