The rain makes people drive exponentially more stupid than usual.

Applied for Goose’s passport in April, for the passport in May... it’s now July and we haven’t received her birth certificate back. 🙄🙄

In my house we don’t argue about the toilet seat staying up or down (it stays down). The real battle is Netflix closed captions staying on or off.

I ate a Hot Pocket. It was very 1997.

Goose: I wanna make friends on the bus but they’re all #crackheads

When you’re simultaneously happy in life but still fucking annoyed by every little thing. That’s me. O_o

My husband has been asleep since 7:10pm. 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️

My boss tested #positive for the #flu yesterday and said he’s still coming in the office today. Wow.

I’m at the doctors office and the Friends Pivot episode is on. 💀💀💀

Today is Monday.

I just sharpened my pencil and my dog looked so confused by the sound.

Goose countdown, 55 hours!!

I have a boyfriend now and he's fantastic. In love :)))) Smitten <3 All that jazz!!

MY EYE IS SO JACKED UP. I had to get an iPatch. Ugh.

Love FaceTiming with Goose and when her little friends txt me <3

Goobs FaceTimed me to show me the Barbie dresses she's sewing and tell me her dad chipped a tooth. o_O

I really need to start tweeting more.

Austin kids are out of school for the summer. #cantdecideifgoodorbad Ugh.

I currently use 2 monitors at work, I asked if I could get a 3rd one installed at my desk. My request has been granted. I'm so happy.

When no one is at work, I listen to music and sing. I do NOT have the voice of an angel. The receptionist calls me American Idol. LOLs.