aaah what the heck is this beautiful process. this is a new one

Try to imagine pugs living in the wild, just roaming in the forest in packs.

Chilling irony of fate. Kasab has dengue & may need blood transfusion. The blood of Mumbaiites. The same blood that he so casually spilled.

A quantum of dark blitheful grin.

GOOD MOURN-ING

@evils_heart ... are transformed into blood sucking vampires.

busting sick dance moves in this club, all eyes on me. haters saying "this is a library" lol w/e dudes atleast i didnt bring books to a club

I just spent 15 minutes looking everywhere for my phone only to realize that life is a dark abyss of meaninglessness and it was in my jacket

hey girl, are you the grains of sand running through the hourglass of mortality? because you're very fine

live every day like it's your last

Ox's are my favorite animal. They're all hugs and kisses.

"I CHOOSE YOU, JASON DERULO!" *Jason Derulo launches from the Pokeball & just sings his name over & over* *sigh* "goddammit Jason Derulo"

"I DEMAND... A TRIAL BY COMBAT" "sir it's just a parking ticket, I..." "WHO WILL BE MY CHAMPION"

Ok let's take a look at what your résumé says here..."you're hired." Hmm thats not very impr- wait a minute, did you just-? Damn you're good

If someone ever intimidates you, remember that they're 70% water. Are you scared of water? Well you should be. 400,000 people drown per year

[squirrel cop kicks down my door] "I'VE GOT A SEARCH WARRANT BITCH" [im in the bathroom frantically flushing hazelnuts down the toilet]