I just know the ancient Egyptians had some banger slurs for the sea peoples

Cops do not protect people. They are always protected from the consequences of their actions. Don't trust cops.

🤨

Tried to replace the headlight bulb on my Prius and fucked it beyond repair

Stardew Valley is real. I’ve been there. And talked with all my friends at the bar. Late into the evening.

The bars are open tonight in Stardew Valley. Come get drunk in beautiful Stardew Valley.

Interviewing a Girl Scout for a feel good story and we’re both suspended below the helicopter by rope

May the fourth be with you Star Trek fans

I’m gonna steal these

I’m outside matt Walsh’s home and his behavior is making me feel very unsafe

Super Smash Brothers is literally the best video game ever created … 🔥 yeah I said it

Constructing a ziggurat in my back yard to communicate with grey aliens. Unfortunately I have drawn the ire of the federal government.

[this user has never fought Steve]

Laughing and drinking with all my friends in Stardew valley. Neil young’s harvest moon is playing from the jukebox through the night. The song doesn’t seem to start or end, like it goes on forever. And it never starts to grate.

Teaching my pet chimp to smoke weighted cigarettes. When the time comes he will be ready.

I made Stardew valley real through the power of my dreams 👤👤👤readers added context Stardew valley was already real bitch boy

Trash nytimes justifying why the white man who murdered Jordan Neely wasn’t charged, + my voice to the righteous chorus of WTF world are you “reporting” in. In 2021 over 40% of felonies & 50% of misdemeanors in NY were DISMISSED after charging b/c case not able to be proved

Shout out to that tiktok guy who’s wife makes him nachos while he cuddles up in his big blankie on the couch. He’s the blueprint fr.