I apologize on my friend's behalf for an upsetting message about "divine intervention." I don't think it was intended to be hurtful. "I don't care what he intended," the recipient says. "I don't care!" #dream

I drive two cars at once, remotely. By parking one on the pavement, I half crash the other into a friend's garden. I manage to keep it on four wheels. Just. #dream

A couple watch a sci-fi movie. Black Widow accidentally starts an explosive timer. "Women are always ruining men's plans," the female viewer observes. She sighs. "Men are assholes," her partner says. "They're like children." #dream

The lights of my external keyboard flicker. Smoke comes out of it. I take it outside where it promptly catches fire and sets fire to a chair and table. #dream

I'm playing a character that goes blind after being kidnapped as a child. He struggles to get around, learning to use his remaining senses. I keep peeking. #dream

The last thing I say before bed is that I will keep the seed dry. I dream that I get the seed wet and it swells to the size of a plum and starts sprouting. #dream

It's like flypaper, but it's the size and shape of a Chinese paper lantern. Inside the house, it's sticky. Outside, however, the flies fly away a few at a time. #dream

An authority on writing is critiquing a short story. He is kind, bordering on ruthless. #dream

Patrick Moore gatecrashes dinner. He partakes in some witty banter that I can't follow, then shoots us one by one with his finger. We pretend to die. "What an exit." We discuss whether or not this is a #dream. I say it's a great reminder to reality check. Still not #lucid!

The man talks through a ventriloquist's dummy. He stays calm. The dummy is furious at having been left on the floor. #dream

The girls fight to see who has the most ability. It's two against one, which is about fair. The lone girl in black flies at one but misses. She explodes herself into dozens of black shards of glass, forms a star, and tries again. Her opponents call for a truce. #dream

A military jet lands in the street, between my house and the house opposite. It bumps into the upstairs bedroom window, but sets down, with just inches to spare on either side. #dream

I'm in the street with a friend, a keyboard, and a guitar. She likes a tune I make up and I think I should get back into making music. Opposite us is a drummer with just a cymbal. The rest of her drum kit and band, all in yellow and black, are spread out along the street. #dream

I'm in middle school. I visit the high school, which is tucked away in the forest and where the teachers sleep overnight. They all know who I am and are excited to meet me. I feel great until I ask if their fiery colours are coincidence or uniform. They laugh at me. #dream

1800s. A noble is asked to pretend to be someone else - a frenchman - in order to set a trap. He goes from being referred to as a snake to being introduced as Monsieur Barracuda. He plays along, in his wig and tights, until he succumbs to crippling stomach pains. #dream

We infiltrate the storm troopers' tower and climb, climb, climb a metal, spiral staircase. At the top, there is a warning about the kids in the nursery. They watch us, but we avoid eye contact. Unfortunately, our colleague steals a kid, making us trespassers and fugitives. #dream

Story Gone by author Daniel Wallace, available online since more than 1 year and 3 months - She waited for almost two days - Short Édition short-edition.com/en/story/short…

#eurotunnel

A reality TV competition show with Stacey Dooley. It's just me, her, her assistant, and fifteen dirty, unmade beds. I look in the mirror and I'm emaciated, just like all the other contestants. "You're doing fine," she says. "It's gonna be alright." #dream

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