I don’t remember anyone beating Ronaldo when he admitted to rape in court? Oh, ok

anyone else just a total emo fag

what if what if what if i just haha no i could never but if only i did then what if

i am truly worst at what i do best call that the cobain of my existence. call that the. call. okay.

so i can just tweet anything like i can just ncowjoxkwnofpekofpe and some idiot is gonna have to see it this is great

okay so say hypothetically i misplaced something of high value!! so high value that if i ask for help surely anyone who would find it would take it for themselves but i cannot search alone forever. who do i call?

first person to like any one of my posts will lose 10lbs tonight (i will harvest an organ)

mad how you literally require a PhD in cyber security to log in to microsoft office like bro you’re really overestimating my desire to access my university email account

just clearing my head

why the fuck is this so funny to me

how it feels to watch the winter olympics

I keep hallucinating insects flying into my eyes and it’s causing me to erratically blink for no apparent reason in front of people. I’m embarrassed.