If I had a dog I’d fight it. But I’d handicap myself to make sure it’s fair. And then when we’re done we’d go get beer. And Ice Cream

When I said that Hillary Clinton got schlonged by Obama, it meant got beaten badly. The media knows this. Often used word in politics!

Sex with lizard people remains rumored despite scales found in vagina

Look at this fat fucking cat dude

I will take all of the US federal debt. It’s ok. This one’s on me

Sorry, warmie here. It’s hard on Mercury too. Last week we were fixing some of the solar panel connections on one of the habs and the new guy let the plasma welder slip. Cut his coolant line straight through. We tried to get him back inside but we heard the guy boil and burst. :(

What app do you use for showering

On a hot, dry bluff under great Jove’s stare I lay here breathing our breathless air Plumes of sulfur, accompany my prayer! Io doth not relent my dare.

Maybe if I keep scrolling I’ll see the future

Ok fine I’ll watch Conclave