Aristo Plast is on to something 🚬

Breaking bad ka pura plot khatam ho jaata agar Walt bas ek term-life insurance le leta.

Agar aapne Frozen dekh rakhi ho to Olaf naam ke bande ko seriously lena bohot mushkil hota hai.

Is this what rehabs mean when they talk about beating the addiction?

Is Xi Jinping secretly a fan of Karan Johar movies?

Men use Linkedin as a dating app and women use dating apps as Linkedin.

The longer I stay single, the more misogynistic I become. If you're a true feminist then date me and end the misogyny, one person at a time.

& that’s that!!

Everyone in India will tell you what you should do in life but be completely out of touch with the reality of their own lives.

When you pass an exam you expected to fail and now you have no idea about which college to pick.

Bombay mein balconies isliye nahin hoti kyunki aadhi janta phir turant kud jaayegi

only @ delhi metro 😭

Business consultants are like therapists for corporates: They diagnose problems within the company. It is mostly an internal problem. They give advice to improve upon the problem, and the company chooses not to act upon it. And they get paid a shit ton!

Adulting is feeling an impending sense of doom all the time.

That good old days 🫠

Earthquakes work better than alarm clocks

Amazing how one day it just fucking hits you that you're an uncle now.

may just have featured in there.

Trying to be a bit more vulnerable with my stand-up lately. Thanks to the Delta program by the residency (shoutout Nick Linck & Peter D'Ambrosio), I was nudged to share a one-liner about what I’ve been working on.

So then do we all agree... cats best hain?