Fletch is my favorite comedy of all time. Let it influence everything, please! 😂 #FletcherThings

🙃

Fried egg and buttered toast courtesy of my brilliant, thoughtful daughter. ❤️🍳

When you get logged out of an app that hasn't required a login for YEARS and you get in with the correct username/password on the first try:

I forced a bot to watch over 1,000 hours of Dr. Phil episodes and then asked it to write a Dr. Phil episode of its own. Here is the first page.

Mug-n-cheese. Good morning. 😘

Licensing agreements are super effective, so Co-Streaming won't be allowed during the Twitch Pokémon Marathon.

Anyone else read this as "WHAT'S HAPPENING?!?! WTF IS HAPPENING??!" That's how I've read it for a while now.

Life size driftwood horse sculptures by contemporary UK artist Heather Jansch #womensart

Decided to same-day some stuff from Amazon since I'm powering through Labor Day mimosas and refuse to sober up and drive to the store right around the corner. Drink responsibly, folks. 🥂

Somewhere between flan and creme brûlée. Flan brûlée? Damn delicious experiment. 🍮

If you're a parent who isn't excited about back to school then you aren't spending enough time with your children.

Nine Four Eight One Bday. Happy Birthday Queen BEYONCÉ! Remember that time I swear we made eye contact? I remember. (I still swear it.) 👑🐝🎉

These low-flow toilets that need two flushes to handle toilet paper got me staring at the swirling water like:

Steak w/ goat cheese & herb cream sauce. Bloody, baby. A1 & beer battered onion rings. Drank ice cold beer making it and drank even more ice cold beer while I ate it.

Good morning from InspiroBot.me 😅

The easiest way to have people never visit your stream? Complain aggressively on Twitter that people aren't visiting your stream! Would you go into an empty store with a maniac behind the counter screaming "WHY IS THERE NO ONE HERE?!"

During my first cup of coffee I hear the kids getting up at 6am on a SATURDAY. Owl be damned.

Red Velvet, if you please. ❤️ (Red Velvet Whoopie Pies with Vanilla Cream Cheese Filling)

Give Mega Man some ice cream and root beer because we need that floooooooat! 😂