horniest man of all time: “I’m applying to MBA programs”

every hot girl in Manhattan has a dog. why are you still on Hinge when you could just walk around with raw pork in your pockets?

war in the Middle East. war in Ukraine. political assassinations. finance guys with post finasteride syndrome. when does it end?

every office has a Sabrina Carpenter (blonde girl who talks about her sex life way too much)

noooo i love how ran through you are

I hope the US goes to war. it would be so funny if my intern got drafted.

starting a company is one of the most difficult and unlikely paths to wealth. sell feet pics.

I saw someone making nuclear weapons here Israel ישראל

*rubbing his receding hairline* promise you’ll stop? for me?

average couple from your high school. he does “sales” and she’s balls deep in a MLM.

the weather gets warm in NYC and every guy puts on the Peter Thiel woven cabana shirt.

the hottest girl from your high school and the West Village finance guy she’s dating.

Puller Ventures has acquired 500 Bars of Sydney Sweeney Bathwater Soaps for ~$3500 at a cost basis of ~$7 per bar and has achieved Bathwater Yield of 6.9% YTD 2025. As of 6/18/2025, we hodl 10% of all Bathwater Bars.

men will literally start a fund instead of going to therapy.

how many people live in Iran? and can i get a booty pic with your panties on and one without them on? can i also get 3 different pics of your boobs any position. also, can i get just a normal pic or your pussy from the front and one where it's spread a bit open. can i get a

in retrospect, we were wrong to make fun of Zuck for smoking meats. most normal billionaire behavior.

it's not clocking to you that I'm standing on business.

CRUZ: I’m going to start streaming pump fun. CARLSON: you’re a terrible trader! you paperhanded chillhouse! CRUZ: no no, what I’m saying is— CARLSON: how much retardio are you holding? do you even know?

HR is calling me. apparently you’re not allowed to do that thing where you lick someone’s elbow and see if they notice. this isn’t a workplace. it’s a prison.