I just had a phone call from CEO who’s trying to get rid of 2 Coldplay concert tickets for tonight! I can’t go but if anyone and their mistress or side-guy wants it, then give me a shout! Happy cheating Friday x #ceo #coldplay #concert #affair #camera #caught #mistress #husband

Remember that time when you heard what someone did for a living and you lost control of your emotions? What’s the sexiest job you can think off? Happy screaming Saturday xx #standup #comedy #live #tour #crowdwork #job #work #scream #saturday

Do you remember what you were doing when you were 16 years old? If we weren’t working, we were playing with a semi deflated football! Good luck to the 16 year olds voting soon! Happy youth Saturday xx #voting #vote #sixteen #teenage #years #uk #government #life #youth #childhood

It’s not just middle aged couples at Coldplay concerts that need to watch out! But young couples too be careful dating! Happy relationships Monday xx #standup #comedy #live #tour #crowdwork #dating #relationship #couple #monday #flirting

Ed preview week starts, TONIGHT, Yorkshire tour into Bedfringe! 21st July 7pm Haworth 22nd July Sutton in craven 23rd July Settle 24th July Bedfringe Quarry theatre 8pm! ‘The Good, The Pat & the Ugly!’ Happy preview Monday xx #standup #tour #preview #shows #edfringe #festival

I loved doing Edinburgh previews this week! You never know what’s going to happen! Getting heckled by late comers with an arm cast! Happy stage invasion Thursday xx Thank you to beautiful @new_barrack_tavern Sheffield xx #standup #comedy #live #tour #crowdwork #edinburgh

We’ve all written a list! What do you have written on yours? Happy names Thursday xx #list #america #jeffrey #epstein #jeffreyepstein #trump #thursday

Only 5 days until I start my month long run at Edinburgh festival with my new stand up show! Thank you to everyone who came to my previews all this week! Big fringe Friday hugs xx Thanks to Jill, Sarah & Colin & the team at beautiful Haworth xx #standup #comedy #live #tour

It’s time to try and out smart the kids on the internet! The new age verification law on the uk internet! Happy ID Friday xx #uk #new #age #verification #law #internet #website #ageverification #friday

I like to do it last thing at night, my Mrs likes to do it first thing in the morning, when do you like to recycle? This couple have a weird technique! Happy plastics & paper Saturday xx Thanks to lovely @new_barrack_tavern #standup #comedy #live #tour #crowdwork #recycling

If you’re heading up to Scotland next Wednesday, you’ll see me at the lovely @gildedballoon on Chamber street, Edinburgh, every night at 9pm with my brand new stand up show! If you’re up in Scotland this weekend, you can see Donald Trump! The choice is yours! Happy golf Saturday

A married CEO tried to kiss me on stage last night!! Thank you to beautiful Deer Shed Festival for another amazing weekend of shows. See you in Edinburgh this Wednesday night for a month at Gilded Balloon 9pm. Full video released later. Happy festival Monday xx #ceo #kiss #cam

Huge CONGRATS to the Lionesses. All the men’s team around the world should take note! Happy footie Monday xx #women #euros #2025 #football #soccer #final #euros2025 #womenseuros2025 #monday #england #spain #record #breaking #engspa #euro2025

After that Chloe Kelly euro winning free kick, English people will never be the same again! Happy penalty Tuesday xx #chloe #kelly #football #soccer #euros2025 #women #womensfootball #penalty #final #walk #run #tuesday #chloeKelly #england #spain

TONIGHT!! 9pm!! At the Gilded Balloon in Edinburgh, Patter-Hoose, chamber street! I’m doing me first show of the run of ‘The Good, The Pat & The Ugly!’ Every night for a month! Stop watching TV, laptops & your mobile phone & get out the hoose (see what I did there!!) X #edfringe

1st show completed last night! Only another 3,687 shows to go this month! Last night everyone who came to the show dressed up as oranges, lemons & banana’s! Will tonight’s audience come in fancy dress too? See you at 9pm, Gilded Balloon, Patter House, Edinburgh, Scotland, World.X

Day 3 of Edinburgh Festival & the reviews are in! I got a 4 STAR ⭐ ⭐️⭐️⭐️ review from the lovely Kate Copstick & The Scotsman. From my opening preview show. If you’re about in Edinburgh come say hello at 9pm at Gilded Balloon. Happy fringe Friday xx #standup #comedy #edfringe

LIVE AT THE FRINGE! Some people get too scared just to do the simple things like look out the window. 9pm every night at Gilded Balloon, Edinburgh! Happy fringe Friday xx #Standup #comedy #live #tour #edinburgh #festival #edfringe #friday #crowdwork

We’re all broke, skint & in debt according to the news! You better start saving up! It’s not just in the uk, but around the world, people coming to my Edinburgh festival show from America, Brazil & Egypt! See you at 9pm tonight & every night at Gilded Balloon! Happy Edfringe

BREAKING NEWS: BBC launch investigation into ‘Strictly Come Dancing’! Hide your dancing slippers! Happy Fox Trott Sunday xx #bbc #strictly #come #dancing #StrictlyComeDancing #show #tv #investigation #sunday #uk