I’m only half joking here, but if I was almost assassinated twice, I’d probably walk in zig-zags for the rest of my life.

Esse tá bem de comunicação KKKKKKKKKKKKK

Just cope with the heat like real men have been doing for 100s of years

“o influenciador ***** que tem 23 milhões de seguidores” - até outro dia nem sabia de quem se tratava, bizarro

When the recruiter says “we’re like family here”

Segunda-feira de novo. E tem gente que acha que luxo é Rolex, Ferrari ou viagem de primeira classe… Luxo de verdade é não ter que aturar reunião inútil, trânsito ou chefe chato logo cedo. É acordar e decidir o que fazer do seu dia. Antes de qualquer conquista material, o maior

Getting *that* fat is harder than it would be to lose all the weight. People don’t understand the level of gluttony you need to have to get that fat during adulthood.

Dude works a 9-hour construction job and has absolutely zero energy to go to the gym

Só falo no celular assim (sozinho obviamente)

THE NEW CEO OF TARGET MICHAEL FIDDELKE STARTED AS AN INTERN AND WORKED HIS WAY ALL WAY TO THE TOP AFTER 20+ YEARS INCREDIBLE

Just buy whatever watch you think looks nice. If you’re into the movements etc then factor that into your choice obviously. Don’t listen to some stupid list like this to try to cosplay as old money.

august is the sunday of months

The perfect duo 🤍

Normal people eating 150-200 grams of protein daily will go down as as big of a disaster as the lead pipes that took down the Roman Empire.

1970: “Meu sonho é ser pai” 2025: VNTC SEU INGRATO DO BARALHO

DAYTONA

How life feels when you secretely meet up with your ex