We used to be a country. A proper country

Me after Santa brings me coal for being a little stinker all year

Me stocking up on some nice fruits and veggies for my New Year’s resolution so I can throw them in the trash like every year

Nobody: Person who accidentally wrote 23 instead of 24 as the date today: Oh fiddlesticks I do this every year

Alabama fans when the football man retires

You know the burger is about to be $28.50 when the fries come out in this

Salsa just hits different when it’s poured from the salsa carafe

This is like a renaissance painting

White people when sweet caroline comes on at the function

When she sees my meme collection

When the coupe buying you drinks on vacation start giving you this look…

Me on Jan 28th after the chiefs win and we have to continue to see Taylor Swift

Nobody: Every swiftie until the Super Bowl:

Sometimes you can just tell by looking at someone they say “sportsball” at super bowl parties

Anybody know what this app is used for??

Go ahead and get a handful since you wanna act like a goober

The front right burner looking down on the rest of the stove top

April fools prank: tag someone for no reason, so when they open their phone they’ll be all like “hey why’d you tag me for no reason?” and realize what a silly goose you are

What the Airbnb Ring camera sees when me and the gang pull up for a weekend full of shenanigans and tomfoolery

How I see the world after one margarita on the patio of the local mexican restaurant