BREAKING: Aragorn son of Arathorn, who is called Elessar, the Elfstone, Dúnadan, the heir of Isildur Elendil's son of Gondor has arrived at the 2024 #MetGala

Unpopular opinion: having a merch drop ready with a not terribly clever post about a cheesy mug you're selling is the most cringe way for Hillary Clinton to recognize what's happened. Will say, this seems like a very quintessentially Hillary Clinton way to respond.

Hey Elon, Can I have my designs back please? #ElonMusk #Elon_Musk

Thinking about 30 Rock again. Whoever wrote Jack’s line “I worked the day shift at the graveyard and the graveyard shift at the Day’s Inn” deserves a Nobel prize in Comedy Writing.

Great job! Did anyone talk about how he's a rapist, or did that not come up in the prep for this?

"Right, but you forget I'm a worm without any moral or ethical compass, so in a sense it's totally consistent of me."

That’s funny. We know they don’t pay taxes.

Who is going to tell him?

Scratch the surface and we quickly find we barely know our history.

Word is I'll be performing my new monologue, my first in years in NYC for one night only—Friday, July 18th. Details and tickets will be available soon—watch the skies!